Lacey and AJ

Houdini dogs ( kinda )

2011-06-25T09:24:00.000-07:00

Ok so im sitting at work and im texting AJ and were talking about our dogs. I asked how they were doing and he told me Clyde was naughty this morning so im thinking the usual clyde got into the garbage or something like that, that he is famous for. Oh no thats not the case. This is how our convo went.

Lacey: How are the pups?

Aj: Naughty!

Lacey: lol what did they do?

Aj: I left the house for twenty minutes and I put clyde into his little area. ( we have a pen that you can buy from Petsmart that we put him in. Its in the kitchen right next to the kitchen table. ) I came back and there was pee on the kitchen table on the napkins and he was sitting in his pen, Ava was in her kennel, and Kenzie was on the couch.

Lacey: Seriously?

Aj: yup so I went outside and watched through a window to see what Clyde was doing. He jumps on the table stands on it and then he will jump back into his pen.

Anyway we talked for a bit longer and we came to the conclusion that Clyde jumped on the table peed on the napkins then jumped back into his pen. I asked Aj why he would jump back into his pen when he is already out and he said its because he knows he will get into trouble. So he makes these little field trips onto the kitchen table and then jumps back in. My dogs are hilarious! I know I should be mad because thats really sick but I cant help but laugh. Nothing a little disenfectant and bleach wont take out, but whats funny too is the night before we come home and ava is out of her kennel.... We still cannot figure out how she got out. We put her in it and it was shut all of the way ( atleast we were assuming ) Anyway just wanted to share because I could not stop laughing I was dying.

Here is the little bugger.

Just look at him, he is naughty! Love this dog...

Interesting article I was reading!

2011-06-24T13:36:00.000-07:00

There's a lot to like about the weight-loss article published yesterday in the New England Journal of Medicine. For beginners, the 20-year study followed more than 120,000 men and women, and the Harvard research team is top notch. But the part that's most interesting is that this group was willing to identify foods that represent "good guys" and "bad guys" in the national struggle with obesity.
In the past, nutritionists and other health professionals have preferred a more vague, less hard-hitting approach: eat moderately, exercise moderately, balance calories in and calories out, yada yada. This obviously hasn't worked, so new thinkers are trying new approaches. A couple of weeks ago, the Food Plate replaced the Food Pyramid–a simple but important step forward. We eat off plates, after all, and portion-control is an important part of weight control.
The Harvard team understands that we eat foods first and foremost, not calories. And according to their findings, the foods we eat make a difference in our weight gain (or loss). With no further folderol, here are the good guys and bad guys. (Note: These numbers represent average weight gain associated with eating quite a lot of these foods vs. not-so-much of them. A negative number (-) is good; it represents weight loss; a positive number (+) represents weight gain. On average, subjects gained a little less than 4 pounds over the four years shown below.)
Yogurt
-.82
Nuts
-.57
Fruits
-.49
Whole Grains
-.37
Vegetables
-.22
Diet soda
-.11
Low fat dairy
-.05
Whole fat dairy
+.10
100% fruit juice
+.31
Refined grains
+.39
Sweets/Desserts
+.41
Processed meats
+.93
Unprocessed red meats
+.95
Sugary beverages
+1.00
Potato chips
+1.69
French fries
+3.35
The yogurt finding surprised the investigators a bit. Most people associate yogurt with calcium (for the bones) and active cultures that might improve stomach health. But why should yogurt hold the top rung as a weight-loss food? The researchers cite "intriguing evidence suggesting that changes in colonic bacteria might influence weight gain."
What about exercise? Yes, the study measured that too, and the high-exercise subjects lost about 1.7 lbs vs. the very-light exercisers. On the other hand, watching a lot of TV led to a weight gain of .32 lbs in four years, and drinking more alcohol to a +.39 lbs.
Remember that all these numbers are averages. Your own situation might be different. Or, as the researchers put it, "Individual variations exist."
The biggest conclusion of all parallels what other investigators have pointed out: Americans are getting fatter at the rate of just 50 to 100 calories per day. That's an almost miniscule number, but it begins to add up after 365 days, and 730 days, and 3,650 days (roughly a decade). Yet the tide could be turned, the Harvard group thinks, if "particular foods and beverages are targeted for decreased (or increased) consumption."
So look at the table above, and see if there aren't one or two good-guy or bad-guy foods that you can do something about in your own diet.

Half marathon

2011-06-14T08:41:00.000-07:00

Ok peeps so I am running the A.F canyone half marathon July 30th. I am so stoked but way nervous! My training is going pretty good, but I must admit I have missed way too many days! Starting now im going to be running or biking five days a week after work. Wish me luck because I sure do need it!

Catching up ( slowly )

2011-05-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, if any of you are still following im so sorry! Lol I know I say that alot ha ha. Life has been so crazy and thats why I have been MIA. Well im going to try harder now I promise.

January 2011

First off if anyone knows, we added a new addition to our family : ) her name is Ava, she is actually clyde's sister. It was kind of funny how it came about. Were really good friends with the breeder Joel. Aj calls him for anything dog related and he likes to keep tabs on the pups. It sounds odd I know, but he really loves these dogs and wants to make sure there being taken care of. Anyway we get a call from him one day asking if we wanted another dog. Keep in mind we already have two! He told us the situation, basically she was in limbo. The guy he sold her to ended up turning around and selling her for a profit. Then the new owners kept her for awhile then decided they couldnt take care of her, so they gave her back to the new owner who then in turn called Joel. He told Joel that he couldnt afford to keep her, he is getting a divorce and wanted to know if Joel would help him about and buy her back for the 400 dollars he bought her for..... Yeah I know! So Joel being the great guy he is agreed. Were pretty sure she has been beat, she is really timid. Well we fell in love with her and she has been a great addition to our little family, she has come along way and is finally getting some confidence. She is quirky, loves socks, loves to lick her butt for about an hour at a time, loves to roll in my garments, loves to chew up my toms, has the biggest feet in the world and is clumsy as ever, but is the sweetest dog in the whole world! Ill blog on some more updates soon guys!

Ava and Kenzie

Sweet little Ava on point

Life as of late.

2010-09-19T15:42:00.000-07:00

Life is still pretty much the same, I got a calling in the ward. I got called to the enrichment activities board. Nothing too special but I love it! I love my ward, Aj and I have made friends with another couple who we love. Tyler and Corinne Craig and there lab toby. We love it because were all newly weds kind of and we have dogs who love to play together. They are hilarious and we love there friendship.

Aj's brother Cooper left on his mission on the first. It was hard. I think I cried more with him then my brothers ( sorry guys ) we sure do love and miss him but we know that what he is doing is right and that the people of Bolivia need him. Were so proud of our coop, and I know this is a great sacrifice on his part but were so proud of him!

Hunting season is coming : ) its Clydes first season and were excited for him, he is a great retriever and an awesome dog. He loves the water and loves the birds. He is a quirky bugger that keeps us laughing, but we know he will do great.

Aj is still at Doug Smith Autoplex so if anyone needs a car you send them to him! He can do some pretty great deals. He still isn't sure what he wants to do but Cooper made him promise that he would be in school when he came back. Lets hope he is done with school at this point in time lol. Aj finally finished the beast, she is beautiful and he loves the thing. Im not gonna lie so do I, I secretly curse him as he drives away in it. Jk but its alot of fun I love driving the thing and she wheels great!

My brother Parker and his wife Brooke just welcomed there first baby Benjiman Parker Holladay on Sept 12th he was so small! Only five lbs! My other brother Cameron and his wife Annie welcomed there first baby CJ ( Cooper James Holladay ) in May and he is such a smiley guy I sure do love him. Next is my brother Kelly and his wife Monique in November. They will be having a girl!

Summer was too short and had very few vacations, I take that back it had NONE! We are so busy but hopefully we will be heading out on one soon.

Well thats all for now but I will try and update sooner!

Very long uuuuupdate.

2010-09-19T14:16:00.000-07:00

Hello guys! Sorry its been so long again, we dont have the internet so im doing this on what spare time I do have. I apologize but im sure you're all used to it : ) So here it starts

April:

I was working two jobs at this time and Aj putting as usual about a 100 hrs per paycheck. As you know we got this new puppy clyde. Well I hated having him cooped up in a kennel or corner for eight hours strait and I work twenty minutes away so it wasn't exactly convenient to run home on lunch. So we devised a plan. I had my neighbor walk him twice a week on our long days. Every Saturday and Thursday. I remember on Wednesday sitting home and I got this random thought in my head of certain scenarios that could happen to clyde. I thought what if she doesnt hold the leash right and he runs off, or gets hit by a car, or gets attacked by another dog, but I of course shrugged it off as me just being a worry wart. Thursday rolls around and I go to work as usual. I come home and walk in expecting to see Clyde and a note from this girl saying how long she walked him that day, but neither was the case. I thought maybe she came and grabbed clyde late. I then went upstairs to my extra bedroom to start hanging curtains. I was standing on the stool when I saw this girl walking up to my porch and no Clyde..... At that point I was a little worried. What in the world was going on? I ran downstairs and opened the door right as she was going to knock. As soon as I opened the door and saw her crying my stomach clenched and my heart dropped. " Where is Clyde?" she then told me how she took him to the park and he started to chase a bird and the leash slipped out of her hand. He ran into a moving car and it scared him so bad that he darted. She told me she chased him for about half a block and went home to have her parents help look, but they couldn't find him. (I am not sure how the whole traumatic stress sequency goes but I think its like this. ) Ok I said, I then grabbed my car keys and said dont worry we will find him. I then said a silent prayer and went looking. I called Aj and he left work right away to come help. We looked non stop until midnight. ( this was on a Thursday ) And still no Clyde. We assumed that someone had grabbed him and we would just call the pound in the morning and he would be there. So at this point I was still in denial I believe but very worried and confident that we would find him. The next morning I dont think Aj and I spoke to each other until we said goodbye. It was sooo silent and its hard to think about what we were feeling at that point in time. ( lol im fighting back tears at this moment writing this, dumb I know ) So we came home friday night, and Saturday night and went strait into "look for Clyde mode" and not ONE sign of the bugger. Our neighbors helped us look for about two hrs the first night he was gone and then it came down to us. Our families were so amazing as well they all at some point helped us and we appreciated it so much. We went and printed up some fliers and posted them on every single sign and corner we could find ( im not kidding I think it took the city weeks to take them all down ) On Saturday Aj and I both decided that we would fast all day to find our little bugger and we prayed constantly, that same day a teared up Aj called me saying a girl in the neighborhood below us had spotted Clyde. She described him perfectly it seemed, finally some hope! We looked until about two in the morning that night. On Sunday we recruited Aj's brother zach to help us find Clyde, and Aj borrowed a scooter from a friend. It was the only humor I got out of the whole thing seeing zach ( who isn't petite one bit ) riding on the back and Aj with his camo gear on driving. The two of them covered alot of ground from streets to the walking path and back on the streets again. We then came home still without our Clyde. Monday came and Aj and I both had pretty much began to accept that we would probabley never see him again. We both went about our business. It was about four when Aj walked into my work and the first thing he said to me was " they found Clyde, I need your keys" I just sat there staring at him! I couldn't even believe it. I had finally accepted that our lives had to move on and we found him? The relief that washed over me was nothing I had ever felt before. Aj then told me that he got a call from a phone number he didnt recognize, he wasn't going to answer it but he did. He said hello and the voice on the other end said " Aj, I've got Clyde " His name is Art, and he breeds German Shorthaired Pointers which is Clydes breed. Clyde had wandered into his construction site about five miles from our house. ( we live west of the lake and so where clyde traveled was all desert fields and hills ) he told Aj that his rear left foot was ripped open by a hunters snare. Which if you dont know what that is, its like a noose that wraps around the leg of an animal. It usually breaks the leg or does what they call degloving the leg, ie. taking all of the skin off. And that Clyde was extremely skinny. So I bet you're wondering how he found us. About an hr before that I had reposted my lost add on Ksl.com and Art knew that Clyde was someones pet ( maybe it was from the leash still attached to his collar?.... No we didnt put tags on him, were dumb I know ) and he told his bird dog buddies to find a way of tracking down the owners. Art had dog kennels in the back of his truck with dog food and water, he fed and watered Clyde and then put him in the kennel to wait for Aj. So Aj grabbed him and rushed him to our vet where I met him there. When the vet brought Clyde in and we first saw each other Clyde barely able to walk because he was so malnourished made his way to me, put his head on my leg and cried he saddest cry I had ever seen. I could not believe my little man was still alive, and in this room with us! The vet told us that the wound on Clyde's leg was extremely infected and she was afraid that it got into the bone. If it did then they would amputate it. She didnt want to close it, with him being a working dog, she was afraid that she didnt have the expertise...? So she sent us up to a surgeon in Salt Lake. At this point were very worried about the cost, but I told Aj I dont care how much it costs with what he has been through we owe it to him. 2,000 dollars and 10 lbs later Clyde is well and chasing birds.

Clyde's foot was wripped open to the bone and he went from 40 lbs to 29 lbs. But he is a fighter and he survived five nights at six months old in the wilderness. I can only attribute that to the many people praying for us and his return ( he kind of had a fan club ), Clyde's will to keep looking for us, our constant searching, Art Clyde's rescuer, and of course my Father in heaven. I know this sounds so cheesy but I dont care, my testimony of prayer was strengthened and so was my faith. With the lord all things are possible and this furthered proved that for us, I know for a fact that without all of these things combined that Clyde wouldn't have made it home, and I know for a fact that father in heaven was watching out for my little guy and keeping those coyotes away. Every vet we saw said he was lucky to be alive and that they were surprised with his injuries that he made it as far as he had. I am so grateful to family and friends, my sweet husband who stayed so strong for me through it all, and my heavenly father who no matter what trial we are going through in our lives whether the outcome is good or bad will be there unwavering to comfort and love us.

2010-04-30T20:17:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday AJ my love!!! I'm so thankful that you were born! I cannot tell you how thankful I am for you, everytime you smile it makes me feel like everything in the world will always be ok even if it were falling apart. Thank you everything you do for me. I'm so grateful that the lord brought us together.

Been awhile....

2010-04-14T13:49:00.000-07:00

Hey guys can I just say im sorry? Im sure I dont have awhole lot of readers, but to those of you who do read, thank you and im sorry. Lol its been soooo long! So I guess I will catch you up as quick as I can....

Last August we bought a house in the ranches, I absolutely love it! Its 3000 sq ft, 3 bedrooms and 2 1/2 baths. It doesnt exactly feel like a home yet. I think its mostly because I havent really filled it, but thats ok its a slow process and im ok with that. Except for the fact that I pass my loft everyday and I loath it, why? Because its empty! Ha ha I put a few things in there, they consist of the decorations that I havent really gotten to hanging. I still havent figured out where to put them. But I have painted a few walls, ill post pictures soon : ) Right now were trying to get our backyard finished. I would explain that but this post would get real heated real quick. Lets just say that our builder is supposed to build the back portion of our fence and they havent come through on that promise yet. They even told us we had to do it when we first moved in the little buggers, they forgot to mention that that was there responibility.

In December we got my little hunting buddy clyde! ( yes its a red neck name, youll get over it ; ) but he is a hunting pup what do you expect? ) jk but the whole meaning behind the name is that aj's parents dog annie had puppies about ten years ago and they gave away this puppy to there neighbors. He ended up being an amazing dog and his name was clyde. He died I think at the age of 3 from some sickness and so aj's family has a soft spot for him, but I love the name so like I said you will get over it ; ) im totally kidding. Ok so we got him right before x-mas and he has grown so much! He is about 39 lbs and he is 6 months old. I hope he is big! If any of you have seen german shorthaired pointers there a medium size dog. Our kenzie is about 50 lbs, so im hoping that he ends up being alot bigger. Mostly because I have little man syndrom and so my dog would be making up for that ; ) No seriously I just want him to be a big old hunting machine. He already is showing awhole lot of potential. The day we got him we threw a toy and he brought it right back to us, without fail every time. He loves to carry things in his mouth, so to us that signals that he will be a great retriever ( one thing our kenzie struggles with ) He is always bringing you a gift when he sees you, he will pick up the most random things from a shoe to a screw driver etc.... Oh you wont believe what he did two days ago, ok bare with me for a second. So im at home and I take him out to go potty. Usually you just open the door and he goes and does his business then comes right back inside. So I open the door and right when he reaches the end of the steps he has these little turbos kick in and flies around the corner. So I go over to investigate and I look over my railing to see him chasing something ( oh by the way its dark ) I thought it was a cat so im out there yelling at him when he stops and comes up the steps inside. Im still looking over the railing trying to figure out what he was chasing when I hear a squeek squeek. So in my mind im like wait was it a squeeky toy he was chasing?! I go inside right as he comes to me and drops a VOLE!!! Do any of you know what a vole is? there like a mole, they ruin your yard and they tunnel under your grass and make those mounds that are so uneven. So he drops it and so I grab him so he will stop trying to eat the dang thing. I call aj and ask him what I should do?! the things sitting in my corner traumatized and bleeding. Aj's response.... " take it in the garage and squish it with a shovel" are you serious?! I can shoot a bird no problem but I couldnt squish this dang vole. So I chucked him in the weeds in the back yard. I figured I might as well keep the local food population happy.
Anyway he also swam for the first time on sunday. He just hopped right in. He definitely is skeptical of the water but not afraid of it. I was so proud of him. Im pathetic I know. Ill post some pictures soon.

So at the moment Aj is in the middle of building this way sick jeep tj. They just painted it, and they have the front axle done as well as the suspension. Right now there working on the rear coil overs and the rear dana 60 axle. Were pretty excited but im mostly just excited to have it done. Aj is still working at Doug Smith Autoplex ( if anyone needs a car please send them to aj he will give you such an awesome deal! ) And I am working 40 hrs a week at Peerless Beauty Supply and also about 20-30 weeks at Sunkissd tan ( no E in sunkissd, just making sure you know im not retarded all of the time ) So basically we dont ever see anyone or eachother lol. But it will be worth it in the end. I figure I might as well bust my butt right now and pay off debt and put more towards my house payment so that later on im not stressing. Im also thinking about going through the police academy or being a state trooper. Ive wanted to for a LOOOOONNNNGG time, im just getting to the point to where im like ok we need to get this show on the road. I know its weird imagining me doing that, but with the way I grew up not having parents because of drugs and what not it makes me want to try and make a difference in the world the best way I know how. Im still looking into it, but im pretty positive im going to do it. Its just a matter of time : ) Sorry y post is so long! thanks for reading, ill have pictures up soon and more posts!

sorry...

2009-10-14T22:43:00.000-07:00

sorry to all of my blog readers I have def been slacking! its been crazy what with not having a job to getting one, to getting into our new home, and not having internet yet. Plus my sister getting married in a couple of weeks and my brother getting married next month as well. I will let you know what's going on soon! so once again I'm sorry and thanks for being patient!

Sad Sad day....

2009-07-02T12:33:00.001-07:00

I lost my job yesterday...... Probably the worst timing possible..... A.J and I have been trying to get into this home. We got approved officially on Tuesday and I was so excited. I wish it could have just been delayed until we closed. A.J could afford it on his own, so thats not the issue. He just cant qualify without me. Now we dont know what to do. I slept a total of about 3 hours last night and spent the rest crying. Its my fault, lol maybe if I didnt suck at life right? Anyway I better just accept the fact that something that was working out so well, was just too good to be true......Hopefully next time I will have something happier to blog about. Sorry to be so depressing. I just finally felt like things in my life were going right. I grew up being told by my drug addicted, abusive parents that I would never amount to anything. I feel as though I have succeeded in being the opposit of them, but cant help but feel like they are right sometimes. Its my pity party right now and I know that is selfish. I just feel like I have let my husband down. I think I might go to the temple and hopefully that will put my life in perspective. Until then I hope everyone has a good one.

I forgot one more thing!

2009-06-19T09:20:00.000-07:00

I also forgot the best news as of late. So I have to tell you the story, when I was 17 almost 18 I went into American Eagle to buy some clothes for Aj. The cashier asked me if I wanted to sign up for a credit card and I told him I wasnt old enough. He said how close are you to 18? I told him a few months and he told me it would be fine. I had never had a credit card but my dad always always was teaching us about them and how there not good if you dont use self control or good judgement. And so I knew it wasnt the best idea but I was determined to prove to him and myself that I could be responsible with it. So I got the card and I said to my self I will only put a $100.00 Dollars on it and then when I get paid in two weeks I am paying it off completely. So I got paid, and I didnt have a checking account or anything, so I always just cashed my checks. I went in and asked how I could pay my card off. The kid Daniel ( yes I still remember his name ) asked how I was paying ( because he was going to see if he could scam me or not ) I said cash. He then proceeded to say I could just pay him and he would send me a receipt in the mail! ( wow how could I be so stupid! ) I then agreed and handed him a hundred dollars. He pocketed my money I am assuming ( seeing as how the only way to pay on those cards is over the internet and for some reason it didnt end up getting paid off....) It took them six months to notify me and I was so scared to tell my dad that I tried to handle it on my own. Long story short they screwed my credit! I had Aj talk to one of the creditors about a year in because I didnt see how I kept paying on it and my balance wasnt going down. The guy told him if we paid 170.00 dollars right now then he would shut the account and he would take off all of the interest. We did that and he ended up not taking off the interest so it took them another six months to contact me again! ( by this time american eagle sold my credit and then they sold it again. So this is the third creditor ) I had my mom draft up a letter recently to send to them and to send to the 3 major credit score companies. And when I say I, I mean AJ! He just called them yesterday and they said that they are closing my account and that it will be completely off my credit and in 20-30 days my credit will show like it should have been. There saying above a 750! I never miss a payment on anything and I never go over fifty percent on any credit line.

I have to give the credit to AJ who has been dealing with them for over a year now ( and I have been fighting them for two years! ) He took it in his hands and took care of all the messy stuff. He is the reason why I am delinquent free. He is so amazing and I am so grateful for him. He makes me so happy and he is my rock! I love you AJ and I will never stop smiling with you around!

Lately

2009-06-19T09:03:00.000-07:00

It has been so crazy lately!!!! I wish I had something really interesting to blog about but I dont. Lately we have been searching for a house. It is a love hate relationship! I love looking at houses and walking in and seeing what I do and dont like and what I could do to the space, but I hate how stressful it is. Especially when you find a house you like just to find out that its under contract or the people who put in offers are way over your price range. We had two that we really liked but we couldnt decide between them. Then we finally made up our mind on a sunday and she called on the following monday.....and of course they both went under contract saturday night. That really bummed us out especially because there werent alot of houses on the market that we loved! Well our lovely realtor ( who is amazing! ) found us our dream house!!! ( well for first time home buyers that is ) and we love her for it! ill post a few pictures, and I need to learn how to wait until things are guaranteed before I run my mouth but its hard. We are 99% sure that we will qualify completely. We have our down payment, now we just need to wait for the banks and for it to close. They are telling us that they are pretty sure they can get us closed in the middle of july!!! And if that is the case its going to be a busy busy month! We are going to moab the first week of july for the fire works and of course four wheeling. Then we will come home and move! I am so excited! I keep praying my little heart out that if it is the lords will than it will happen. I know if I do my fifty then he will do his fifty. Its crazy because I have noticed the more I go to the temple, the more I read my scriptures and the more I try to remember my prayers in the morning the more blessings I receive. He is amazing and I dont want to know where I would be without him!

ps: the pictures dont do it justice, when you walk in the front door you see the stairs up to the loft and all above you is open ceiling all the way to the roof with windows up there. I love it, once we get moved in I will put up more pictures.

A little late I know!

2009-06-11T13:32:00.001-07:00

Kenzie is obsessed with rocks so this above is her trying to dig one out of the bottom.

Like I said she wants to catch them so bad, she did this all day and could do it forever!

My little mountain goat on the rocks trying to get the best view of kenzie

Oh how much I do love this person, He is amazing in everyway possible!

Sorry everyone that my blog has been a little (ok alot) outdated. Life has been so busy. first I will tell you about our two year anniversary. Well I know that you are supposed to be doing the big fun anniversaries at first and then they get dull as you get older, lol but we do the opposite. On our first anniversary we painted our bedroom wall, and now this anniversary I had him take me shopping. AJ is so cute, he got a room up at sundance resort and planned out all these fun activities, So here is how our conversation went.

Lacey: How much total is it?
AJ: um....$400.00
Lacey: holy crap dude
AJ: Well I was afraid that you would be disappointed if I didn plan something fun.
Lacey: You are buying me a house, thats plenty!

So the plan is, as our anniversary present to eachother we are just going to purchase a house. That sounds good enough to me!

Anyway that day we took the dogs out to a little lake/pond behind Lone Peak to let them swim. Hilarious!
Kenzie is a hunting dog so she just gravitates toward any animal that could be considered a game animal. There were ducks all over the place and she would try and sneak up on them. She would start to get close to them in the water and then once she got close she would lay low in the water and glide towards them. Hilarious. And gizmo doesn realize that he can swim so he just goes in as far as he can reach and then he makes sure that he can see her. There were these little docks on the pond/lake and I watched him go out on one so that he could get a better look at his girl and a board was missing....well he didnt realize that and fell through! Wow talk about scaring the crap out of someone, I thought he was going to drown! So I went charging over there my hear beating a bajillion miles an hour and he came swimming out from underneath it. Then I could laugh but it did really scare me and him. Then gizmo and kenzie found a dead cat fish and they played with it a little in the water. so sick!

all in all it was a great anniversary! I love you so much AJ, you have taught me so many things, the biggest is how to love someone unconditionally. Sometimes I just sit and think about him and I cant help but smile. The lord must really love me to have sent you to me. I cant wait to spend eternity with you. I dont deserve you and I hope that one day I will!!! Always and Forever love!

Our two year anniversary

2009-05-13T14:52:00.000-07:00

So our TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY is in just a couple of weeks ( june first) I cannot believe its been two years! man does it fly by! But there is one thing I can tell you and thats that it has been the most memorable, fun, eye opening, interesting two years of my entire life! I cannot tell you how much I love Aj, I thought I loved him two years ago but thats nothing compared to right now. Everyday my love grows stronger and it will be stronger tomorrow then it is today. I am saying too much ha ha I should wait until the actual day I know. We had our photo's done to mark our two years together at wheelers farm. It was alot of fun and alot of smiling. Ill post my favorites. I just got the cd back yesterday and she had taken 425 photo's! We will be doing somemore soon, our friend Kurt just got into photography and is building his portfolio. So he asked us if we would like to do some, and we said yes of course. It really is awkward but I love pictures there so fun!

St George Fishing Trip

2009-05-13T14:36:00.000-07:00

This was me at six in the morning cold!

Aj's big fish! Atleast 4 lbs

Conners fish

I am on my lunch break so I only have half an hour so I have to make this quick. So this last weekend we went to st george to fish. We left friday evening, which friday ended up being an adventure in of itself. We intended to leave as soon as everything was packed up, so we had everything ready to go and we drove to conners house to meet up and leave. We got there and no conner..... Aj then called him and asked where he was. I guess conner was at his sisters house, he had to come home and drop his dog off then we were going to leave. The last thing aj said to him was to hurry. ( knock on wood is what we should have done ) Conner was trying to hurry and some lady he was following stopped at a green light and conner rear ended her. We then waited for the cops and they all did there whole investigation and decided that no one was at fault when in fact the lady stopped at a GREEN LIGHT! We then proceeded on with our trip with conner in pain the whole time because he already has a jacked up back and then he got in an accident. We got to st george and the weather was fantastic!!!! ahh it was so warm I loved it. Our trip consisted of alot of swearing from aj, conner falling, me almost beating them with the amount of fish I caught, peeing off the side of the boat, my hook getting caught in weeds and aj saying" just yank really hard" which I then proceeded to do and my hook comes flying back and barely missing both of them, alot of laughing, launching at six in the morning, lots of sun, and of course a whole lot of fun!!!!! I am now hooked on fishing. I never thought I would like it but man after you start to catch alot of fish its so fun!

On sunday it was the hottest, 80 degress! I did not want to come home. Next time we will plan for a longer trip. Three days is not long enough!

Control Your Attitude

2009-04-24T08:44:00.000-07:00

I found this quote and I loved it so I thought I would share it.

Successful people understand how critical the skill of having a good attitude is. I won’t tell you that having a good attitude is going to keep things from happening to you, or make your life perfect. We all have challenges; however, having a good attitude will help you deal with the things that happen to you. And really that’s what we need, the ability to deal with the things that happen to us. We all have challenges to face, but it is how we deal with those challenges that will determine our success. If you were traveling in a car and got a flat tire, -you wouldn’t give up on your trip, you’d fix the tire and continue on toward your destination. The same is true for any challenge we face. Successful people learn from the problem and then leave it behind in their rearview mirror.“We cannot choose the things that will happen to us. But we can choose the attitude we will take toward anything that happens. Success or failure depends on your attitude.” Alfred A. Montepert

Gone Fishing

2009-04-24T08:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday on lunch I went and visited Aj at work, Aj thinks he is good at hiding his feelings but he really isnt. I asked him whats wrong and he started to tell me how frustrating his job is going this month. Last month Aj had the best month that he has had since he has worked at Doug Smith. And as many of you know Aj sells cars so he all commissioned based. With Aj, its hard for him to sell cars if he is stressed. We just took a trip to Moab a couple of weeks ago and so he got out of his groove and started the first of the month with zero cars. ( he stress's way more than he should be ) And some of the salesman arent very nice, he has had a couple of deals get stolen from him and nobody owns up to it. Long story short, I asked him what releives his stress and he told me fishing. So I asked him if he wanted to go fishing after work. He then replied " lacey I get off at nine, it will be dark " So then I started formulating a plan. I thought if we cant go fishing then why dont I bring the fishing to him! then I thought, how do I do that legitimately? I thought at first I could go get goldfish and stick them in those small plastic pools but I didnt want to purposely kill the fish. So I hit up smiths and got a kiddy pool, and some of those fish with the dinky fishing poles. I proceeded to fill it up and stick them in there. My dogs follow me everywhere and so they came outside and next thing I knew they were in the pool dragging out the toy fish!!!! ha ha so funny! Aj came home I showed him and I think it brightened his spirits a little bit. We both had more fun watching the dogs enjoy it more than we enjoyed it, but here is the best part! I was just loading the pictures on here, and I clicked the box that says to erase them off the memory card when finished. I just looked to upload some and there all gone!!! Im so mad!!! Oh well, I will try to reinact tonight : (

Moab Jeep Safari 09

2009-04-23T11:45:00.000-07:00

My brother Camerons Jeep

AJ's Jeep

My Sister and I

So this last easter we took a trip to Moab for the Easter Jeep Safari. We left wednesday april 8th and we towed aj's jeep down. On the way there we were so excited we couldnt stop talking about it. We had a great drive except that we got half way down there and aj turns to me and says whats flying around back there? I looked back and in the bed of the truck the lay in bed liner was coming out and half of it was flying around!!! so then aj was going to stop and I told him no, I ended up crawling through the window to the back of the bed while we are going 70mph and pulling a big jeep. ( it really wasnt that dangerous but it makes for a better story if I tell it like it is ) I get back there and I never realized how windy it gets in the back of those things. I was struggling to pull the matt down from the wind and trying to find stuff to put on top of it. Anyway I got it all put down and I crawl back into the cab and aj looks over at me and just starts laughing hysterically. my hair was sticking up! It took me ten minutes and alot of ouch's later to get all my snarls out. We get to Moab and our supposed suite turned into a regular room. Yeah they screwed us. I think on the last day we had a total of 12 people sleeping in our little hotel room. All they could do was take some money off of the room, but it still didnt make our trip any less fun. This year was the first year in a long time that I hadnt been driving. I sold my jeep last August and got into a car. I sold it because it was falling apart and I want a better one. Aj was nice enough to let me drive quite a few times, and to my amazement I did great! Aj's jeep is a manual, and my car is a manual so I know how to drive one, but I had never driven a manual four wheeling before. It was so easy and now I dont want anything but a manual for four wheeling. We went to potatoe salad and I wanted to drive up that but hubby said no : ( ( I think he secretly didnt want me to drive up it before him ) He said that it made him nervous for me. but I was excited to do it. Maybe next time. We had lots of fun with no broken vehicles and everyone in one piece. Thanks for the trip Aj.

My camera broke half way through the trip so I didnt get as many pictures as I wanted. Sorry!

A great weekend, almost...

2009-03-23T09:22:00.000-07:00

Our failed attempts at keeping the torches lit.

conner kyle and aj

Our sad littl bbq

Mills and broch, love you guys!

So friday night was the release date of twilight and at first I was all gung ho on going at midnight and waiting for the release of the movie. Then I really thought about it ha ha. there was no way! but I wanted the movie so bad! so what was I supposed to do? So I decided to order it off of Amazon. I did the whole one day shipping and a movie that was supposed to cost 17 dollars then cost me thirty. I ordered it on thursday morning thinking it would be here in plenty of time.... well it didnt come and I was so disappointed. I had aj buy it for me saturday so that I could watch it and now I have the headache of sending the one back from amazon which I still have not seen yet.

Saturday was a great day for aj, me, and my aunt sandy. She called me friday night because she wanted a new car and was told to go look at corollas. I kept telling her no, come look at what aj has and he can get you into a great car for way cheap. So she came down saturday and found a subaru exactly like mine, same color and model but a newer year and she was so happy! the best part was that he got her into a brand new subaru with a sun roof and the upgraded sound system with nothing down for 310 a month!!!! I cannot tell you how happy she was. And how happy aj was. He is at nine cars this month and its not even over. What a blessing the lord is in our lives.

So then saturday I was putting together our dinky little bbqer. It is a portable one for camping trips and it has propane and everything its actually really cool. Anyway and so I was putting it together at about noon and it was so sunny outside so I thought why not do a bbq tonight with some friends. So aj and I called everyone and told them and they all decided to come. I went and bought all the stuff and was so excited until the stupid wind storm came. I put the tiki torches outside and we began the task of putting everything together. at about 7:15 we tried lighting the torches. they would stay lit for about five minutes before the wind decided to blow them out. lol I even tried to pray for the wind to stop but I guess the lord thought otherwise. We then abandoned the tiki torches and brought the chairs inside our unfinished basement. Everyone showed up and we ate and listened to Jack johnson. I love my friends, especially millie and broch. There such nice people and broch is so funny he kept walking around our basement with his ideas popping up. I liked it because you then get another opinion and he opened our eyes to new possiblilities for our sad little basement. Millie always brings a smile to my face, she is so sweet and nice. there a great couple! Conner is such a good friend too. Aj and I have been hanging out with him alot and its so fun. It is always interesting. Kyle is just hilarious! who wouldnt love that kid. Aj and I are very blessed to have the people in our lives that we do! thanks so much guys!

On another note, I have cooked aj dinner every night except friday because we went out to dinner. It feels great! I still struggle with my scriptures and will be getting better, I am doing really good at not judging! Every person I look at I think of a positive attribute and it is making me feel happier!

Oh I almost forgot about sunday! Sunday aj's cousin megan came home from her mission where she served in Guam. This talk was the most amazing talk I have ever heard! I have had talks bring me to tears before but she had me bauling and the whole congregation was right there with me too. She talked about how grateful she was for the mission and the people and in every word you could see the love that she had for the lord. Like one story she was telling how charity was huge there. She told one of the members that she wanted to try dog before she came home and the lady went home and killed her dog for her so that she may try it. Or some people didnt have money, one lady made thirty dollars a month and she asked if three dollars for tithing was enough for the lord. People there are so grateful for everything because they dont have anything. Another family had a car and they didnt have money for gas, so they would walk miles and miles everywhere everyday so that they may drive there car on sunday to go to church. It really humbles you and makes you think about things alot more.

Be Grateful

2009-03-20T09:23:00.000-07:00

So I started reflecting on how grateful I should be. Many times we complain not realizing that it is not getting us closer to our dreams but putting focus on things that are really don’t matter. Daily complaining does not draw people to you but pushes those who you want in your life away from you. I recently started ending my day with reflecting on things and people I’m grateful for to bring me into focus. Be grateful for the place you are at now because there are others who are in worst places that would love to be in the struggle you are in.

K so now I am going to post things that I am going to work on next week.

- Not judging, that means even just something that someone is wearing.

- I am going to cook more for aj, whenever I do cook it feels so good!

- Read my scriptures, not just read them but study them. And do it as a family.

- Attend my spin class atleast 4 times a week.

-tell myself one thing that I like about me in the mirror

-Obviously what I wrote above : )

-Be grateful for all my blessings everyday.

Like I said these are things I am going to work on for next week and then I will take whatever I struggled on and redo it the following week followed by something else I need to work on : ) wish me luck!

Friends, Family, and Love

2009-03-06T14:13:00.000-08:00

Friends 1.
Who are your best friends? Aj, Paige, Jen, and Jesus Christ!

2. Do you tell your best friends everything or do you keep things from them? I tell them mostly everything! but I tell aj everything

3. Are you friends with an ex gf/bf? Nope

4. Do friends come before family? Most friends are family

5. Do most of your friends go to your school? Nope I dont go to school

6. Do you have more friends or more aquaintences? um aquaintences

7. Whos the person you have stayed friends with the longest? Jenica! :)

8. Does your best girlfriend come before your boyfriend?Depends on the situation but I love them both!

Family

1. Name the people you live with: Aj, Kenzie, and Gizmo

2. Which parent are you closer to? My dad for sure

3. Why? Because my dad is just the neatest person I have ever met. You would just have to know him, he has this way of helping you understand something even if you dont want to and he never shoves anything on you or forces you to do things. like I said you just have to know him ♥

4. Are you close to your siblings? kinda, mostly my sister

5. Who in your family do you not like so much? depends on the day ; ) jk

6. Is family your first priority? Yep, my little family, and then the rest of them

7. Do you go on vacations all the time? depends. We do Moab alot and california cuz thats where aj is from but other than that not really. but I want to

8. Uppper, middle, or lower class?I guess middle upper class.

Love

[01] Do you still have feelings for your ex?Nope

[02] Have you ever been given roses?Yes just the perfect amount

[03] What is your all-time favorite romance movie?The note book!

[04] How many times have you honestly been in love?Twice

[05] Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate? I think there is more than one person out there for you, well rather there are many people that you could make it work with but I would like to think out of all the people that I could have made it work with aj was the best out of all of them.

[06] Have you ever had sex? ha ha yup I am married

[07] Have you ever had your heart broken?Yep

[8] Your thoughts on online relationships.. I dont have an opinion there honestly

[9] Have you ever seen a guy friend as more than a friend?Yep who hasnt

[10] Do you believe the statement, “Once a cheater always a cheater?”For the most part

[11] How many kids do you want to have?3

[12] What is your favorite color(s)?turqoise and brown

[13] What are your views on gay/lesbian marriage? I think that its gross but at the same time, do they honestly have to call it " marriage " marriage is supposed to be between a man and a woman. so dont call it that, call it something else. and were made to fit like puzzle pieces and they dont fit.

[14] Do you believe you truly only love once? nope

[15] Imagine you’re 79 & your spouse just died, would you re-marry?nope, but I would be kinda glad he made it to that age rather than earlier.

[16] At what age did you start noticing the opposite sex? ninth grade

[17] What song do you want to hear at your wedding?

[18] Do you know someone who likes you?Nope but I know someone who adores and loves me.

[19] Do you like anyone?Nope

[20] Do you love anyone?Yep its my aj and I love him more than life itself!

I got it!

2009-02-07T11:33:00.001-08:00

K so if your reading this and havent read my last post then go read it! : ) so I got the job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a blessing! just thought I would update you on it.

The power of prayer

2009-02-05T09:51:00.000-08:00

Ok so I havent had a job for lets say..... about two months now. Well when your husband is all commission based, you own a house, and two cars, plus all the little stuff, then it can be a little bit frustrating. I feel so bad for aj, he is so stressed. And if any of you know a commission based job, its harder to sell when your stressed. So this is basically my routine. I sit at home, on the computer on facebook, watching movies, and cleaning every speck of dust I see land. It can get a little old after awhile. At first I was like this will be nice to have a break, ya it lasted for about a week. So I have been on every job website known to man sending out my resume to the most ridiculous jobs that I know that I wouldnt like just to take the stress off aj. Plus lets be honest, lol I would love to go shopping. So for the last month I have had a dry spell I havent had any interviews or any feedback. And not to brag but my resume isnt exactly bad. I have an ok work history for pretty good companies. So monday I was sitting here thinking oh poor me, why hasnt anyone called me, when I got this thought. I thought when was the last time I fasted. Strait into my mind just like that and I had not even been thinking anything remotely close to that. And my answere was, five years. I havent fasted for anything for five years!! I am really good about saying my prayers and being faithful in the fact that I know they will be answered. So I decided that I was going to fast to find the right job, and I also fasted for aj in his work. So I ate monday night and then I got down on my knees and said a very long intense prayer to heavenly father. And deep down I knew that it would work, and that it would be very hard for me. But it was a sacrifice I was willing to take. Then after I said my prayer and kissed my adorable husband goodnight, I was laying there in bed trying to fall asleep thinking about fasting and prayer. And I got this overwhelming peaceful feeling wash over me. Usually it takes me awhile to shut down all the noise in my head to fall asleep and I know that the lord knows that. The last thing I remember before falling asleep was how cool it felt and how I knew that everything in my life would work out. Aj asked me how it felt for me to feel the spirit, the best way to describe it is when I see him sometimes I get these little butterflies in my stomach, so that and then add the tingeling sensation all over my body. I honestly cant describe it to match perfectly but thats the best I can do : ). So then I wake up and start going about my day. About noon hits and I am crying and telling aj that I dont think I can last another six hours. And if any of you know me very well I love food, when I get hungry I am cranky. I was told that I am hypoglycemic. ( I probabley spelled that wrong sorry ) So this was very hard for me. So aj told me to say a prayer for strength. I said a silent one in my head and immediately my stomach stopped growling and I got that warming feeling again. It was like that for the rest of the day. But what was cool was, I was sitting there watching t.v and I had a job that I interviewed at the day before. It was a receptionist position at a law firm that is literally five minutes away from my house. They pay really good and it was a very nice environment with very nice people. I want this job bad. But anyway I was sitting on the couch and I got a call from them wanting a second interview! I could not fathom it! When I was done with the first interview with them they told me they would be interviewing for the rest of this week and they would let me know next week what there decision was. And now they wanted a second interview from me in the same week? Ya it was pretty cool, But just cuz I got the second interview doesnt mean that this is the right job for me. If I get this job then it will be the right one. ( I interview tomorrow so I will let you all know) but I do know that the lord will point me in the right direction. So five o clock rolls around and it was time to break my fast. As soon as I was on my knees with my head bowed I felt the spirit so strong that I started crying. I knew that my fasting was not in vain, the lord knew that I was sacrificing to make my prayer that much stronger. And the beauty of it is that my fast wasnt even that big of a sacrifice, it was way hard, but it was worth it. And having the lord know that I love him so much to stop eating and drinking for a whole day felt good. What was even more crazy was that I was almost sad to end my fast. In that 24 hours I grew so much closer to him and I wanted that feeling to stay. What I am getting at is that prayer is such a strong thing!!! I have always known that ( lol I pray to find my shoes when I lose them and I always find them right away) but to add fasting to it, makes it that much stronger. I know that I will find a job very soon and that it will be the right job for me. The lord is going to help me find it. I can not even explain to you how much I love him, and how much I love the church. I dont know what I would do without it, and I know that because of the lord my marriage is alot stronger than it would be without him. I know that my life would be so lost without him also. He led me to my eternal partner and he will lead me to the right job. I hope that you have gotten something out of this and if not thats ok : ) cuz I know that I have.

Short Hair

2008-12-22T12:34:00.000-08:00

So I used to have extensions..... I decided to take them out and I had been contemplating whether or not I wanted to cut all my hair off. Well I didnt have the guts to do it and everyone kept telling me I most likely wouldnt like it. So I decided agains it. Why not wait until I have kids. Well then I took out my extensions, and lone and behold my hair sucked! lol going three months without a trim what did I expect? Now I had to do it. Well I did it and i love it! Its hard to get used to but I love the basically no maintenance part and how easy it is. I am sure that I will soon miss my long hair but for now I am loving my short hair.

2008-12-16T17:54:00.000-08:00

7 things that attract me to my hubby:
1. He is sexy
2. He likes some of the things I like
3. His smile, and his smile lines
4. His love for me
5. His laugh
6. The way he boosts me every day
7. His love for the gospel

7 Things I always say:
1. I love you baby
2. gizzy wizzy
3. kenzie benz
4. gosh dang it
5. haha ya ya
6. goof ball
7. calm down

7 things I love to eat:
1. Pizza
2. fries
3.t churros
4. tostadas
5. apples
6. cheese covered broccoli
7. soup

7 things I can do:
1 look at the bright side of things
.2. laugh
.3 play basketball
.4. I can take a joke
5. Eat crap and not gain weight... im not bragging ppl I just cant think of much.
.6 Be sarcastic
.7. Learn fast

7 things I can't do:
1. Not be baby hungry
2. let things go
3. not stop eating crap
4. wait to go to school
5. Stop loving my husband more everyday
6. get along with my mom
7. I can't stop getting on facebook everyday

Our California Trip

2008-12-16T17:08:00.000-08:00

At the beginning of December we decided to take a trip to Aj's home town of Atascadero, California. So Aj, me, and Conner set off at 10 pm on saturday november 30th. Aj was gung ho on driving all the way through, but conner's back was killing him ( conner was in a bad accident awhile back and his back was broken) so we stayed in primm at buffalo bills. We then woke up to proceed forward with our trip. The trip to atascadero is sooooooooo long. I had to sleep to keep from getting too bored. On the way through you pass through wine country, and man is it pretty. rolling hills or orchards that are worth millions, if not more, of money. Thats when your getting close, and when I get way excited. Anyway we went and stayed with aj's aunt heidy in her amazing, old spanish, house. She is the most amazing lady ever! she cooks for us and is always so happy. And she is hilarious without trying. And of course her husband lee who is the chief of Hollister fire department, He is a funny guy. Our activities included, throwing apples at black tale deer in the middle of the day, Pismo beach, San luis obispo shopping, Mcclentocks ( disgusting) restaraunt, where I was pressured into eating a turkey testicle, pizmo hunting, getting broken for the first time by a chiropractor, and lots of scenic driving. I never really liked california, because all I had seen before I met aj was L.A, but you have to see his old home town. Its amazing!

How Aj and I met

2008-12-16T15:01:00.000-08:00

K this is going to be a long one just to warn you. I was seventeen and so confused about where I was going in life. Especially with the church. I didnt really care who my friends were just as long as they were my friends. I changed who I was constantly just to impress people and I hated who I was. I had this group of friends that I started hanging out with, ( come to find out later caden and aj were friends also ) and they were good kids, who liked me for who I was. Well caden has a jeep, and I have one also. We were boating when he asked if I wanted to bring my jeep up with him and a bunch of his friends. so I agreed. Well this is where aj comes in. So were sitting there airing down our tires and around the corner comes aj with all four tires locked up. ha ha he barely missed me, but he claims he did it on purpose. So were all standing there talking and I couldnt help but notice how attractive he was. Plus he had a jeep so props right? Well I started asking questions from one of the other kids there. Come to find out he is 22, so strike one against me, he is a return missionary, strike two, and he is flirting with one of the girls there, strike three. So by this time I basically just didnt even think twice about it. So I end up getting stuck lol ( no surprise) so were all trying to get my jeep unstuck. Aj turns around on these abnormally large boulders just to pull me out. One of the kids that was there wrapped my tow rope around my brake lines ( he was high i guess) so when aj pulled on me my brake lines got pinched and torn open. Now i am stuck and I have no brakes. Then to make this hilarious situation ( sarcasm) even more hilarious, Caden gets in it and backs it out. So I went and gave him a big hug. Aj apparently felt left out. I thanked him of course. Any way, then we all turn around and I drive home with no brakes. Aj ends up keeping my tow rope for obvious reasons that I had no idea of. He ends up finding me on myspace and then we hung out that night. Well your prob thinking thats the end of the story? lol nope, I am so not done. We hung out for a month and a half strait. I swear all we did was make out ( I kissed him first ) I really liked aj and didnt want to lose him so we had the DTR conversation. He basically told me, in a nice way, that he didnt want a relationship. I was hurt thinking that I was just being used for a make our buddy. Then a couple days later he told me that I was right and he wants more. So now were official. We end up going to get a drink and I saw a bunch of my friends there ( they were all guys) and doing the natural thing I went and said hi and hugged them all. Aj thought I was a hooker ( ha ha) then on my way home from hanging that night he told me over text that he just wanted to be friends. I thought wow, he just wants a make out buddy. I basically told him that until he figures out what he wants im out of there. so I basically just ignored him over the course of two months. And by this time I knew that I loved him, but I wasnt going to admit that to myself. So you can see where I am coming from. Then he black mailed me ( lol) one day I got a picture message from him. It was the first night we hung out, we took a picture on the sinclair dinosoar. And from there he convinced me to hang out with him. And it was history. Its funny, people ask me how do you know. Well its different for everyone, but my first indicator was since the first day I met aj I wanted nothing but to be better. I wanted to be more active in church, I wanted to do everything I was supposed to. I wanted to do everything in my power to be better for him. To be good enough. And everytime I was down ( and still to this day) he boosts me up. Aj never not once has put me down. He makes me feel like the most important person in the world. I dont know where I would be without him. He helped me find me, he helped me heal from all the trauma I have been through. I will always be thankful to him. Mushy I know! but its ok.