Saturday, February 7, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Ok so I havent had a job for lets say..... about two months now. Well when your husband is all commission based, you own a house, and two cars, plus all the little stuff, then it can be a little bit frustrating. I feel so bad for aj, he is so stressed. And if any of you know a commission based job, its harder to sell when your stressed. So this is basically my routine. I sit at home, on the computer on facebook, watching movies, and cleaning every speck of dust I see land. It can get a little old after awhile. At first I was like this will be nice to have a break, ya it lasted for about a week. So I have been on every job website known to man sending out my resume to the most ridiculous jobs that I know that I wouldnt like just to take the stress off aj. Plus lets be honest, lol I would love to go shopping. So for the last month I have had a dry spell I havent had any interviews or any feedback. And not to brag but my resume isnt exactly bad. I have an ok work history for pretty good companies. So monday I was sitting here thinking oh poor me, why hasnt anyone called me, when I got this thought. I thought when was the last time I fasted. Strait into my mind just like that and I had not even been thinking anything remotely close to that. And my answere was, five years. I havent fasted for anything for five years!! I am really good about saying my prayers and being faithful in the fact that I know they will be answered. So I decided that I was going to fast to find the right job, and I also fasted for aj in his work. So I ate monday night and then I got down on my knees and said a very long intense prayer to heavenly father. And deep down I knew that it would work, and that it would be very hard for me. But it was a sacrifice I was willing to take. Then after I said my prayer and kissed my adorable husband goodnight, I was laying there in bed trying to fall asleep thinking about fasting and prayer. And I got this overwhelming peaceful feeling wash over me. Usually it takes me awhile to shut down all the noise in my head to fall asleep and I know that the lord knows that. The last thing I remember before falling asleep was how cool it felt and how I knew that everything in my life would work out. Aj asked me how it felt for me to feel the spirit, the best way to describe it is when I see him sometimes I get these little butterflies in my stomach, so that and then add the tingeling sensation all over my body. I honestly cant describe it to match perfectly but thats the best I can do : ). So then I wake up and start going about my day. About noon hits and I am crying and telling aj that I dont think I can last another six hours. And if any of you know me very well I love food, when I get hungry I am cranky. I was told that I am hypoglycemic. ( I probabley spelled that wrong sorry ) So this was very hard for me. So aj told me to say a prayer for strength. I said a silent one in my head and immediately my stomach stopped growling and I got that warming feeling again. It was like that for the rest of the day. But what was cool was, I was sitting there watching t.v and I had a job that I interviewed at the day before. It was a receptionist position at a law firm that is literally five minutes away from my house. They pay really good and it was a very nice environment with very nice people. I want this job bad. But anyway I was sitting on the couch and I got a call from them wanting a second interview! I could not fathom it! When I was done with the first interview with them they told me they would be interviewing for the rest of this week and they would let me know next week what there decision was. And now they wanted a second interview from me in the same week? Ya it was pretty cool, But just cuz I got the second interview doesnt mean that this is the right job for me. If I get this job then it will be the right one. ( I interview tomorrow so I will let you all know) but I do know that the lord will point me in the right direction. So five o clock rolls around and it was time to break my fast. As soon as I was on my knees with my head bowed I felt the spirit so strong that I started crying. I knew that my fasting was not in vain, the lord knew that I was sacrificing to make my prayer that much stronger. And the beauty of it is that my fast wasnt even that big of a sacrifice, it was way hard, but it was worth it. And having the lord know that I love him so much to stop eating and drinking for a whole day felt good. What was even more crazy was that I was almost sad to end my fast. In that 24 hours I grew so much closer to him and I wanted that feeling to stay. What I am getting at is that prayer is such a strong thing!!! I have always known that ( lol I pray to find my shoes when I lose them and I always find them right away) but to add fasting to it, makes it that much stronger. I know that I will find a job very soon and that it will be the right job for me. The lord is going to help me find it. I can not even explain to you how much I love him, and how much I love the church. I dont know what I would do without it, and I know that because of the lord my marriage is alot stronger than it would be without him. I know that my life would be so lost without him also. He led me to my eternal partner and he will lead me to the right job. I hope that you have gotten something out of this and if not thats ok : ) cuz I know that I have.